Making Lemonade!: “It takes a village” to raise a grandmother

by Barbara Stahl –

“It takes a village” to raise a grandmother!  That was a recent revelation to me when I used a word I had used many times before (I certainly hope I didn’t include it in any writing assignments!) and my adult grandchildren were horrified!  They pleaded with me not to use that word ever, as it has a significant sexual connotation.  I argued with them, and told them in no uncertain terms what that word used to mean in kinder, gentler times.  Then when I got home and consulted an OLD 1990’s paper dictionary as well as a thesaurus in book form, I was horrified to find out they were correct.  If you absolutely want to know what the word is ask me via the e-mail address.  I actually would be curious if my readers have used it innocently for years as well.  If so, and one continues to use it, my advice is to only say it to older people.

Another way my grandchildren have to “raise me” is with technological help.  They can take my smartphone and fix whatever I ask them to — zip / zop and it’s done.  Do I have any idea whatsoever what they just did to accomplish that?  Absolutely not, and a clear, satisfactory  explanation can rarely be given by them.  

Alexa was a gift from one of my older grandsons.  He brought me into the new technological  world where I can talk to a robotic voice residing in a box and accomplish things.  He gave me a couple of lessons before he had to return to his home and job. For the longest time I tiptoed around Alexa and would refer to her when talking to others as the “one who shall not be named.”  I find out from her five minutes after a package has arrived on my front porch from Amazon that it had arrived.  I tell her,  “I know that and am unpacking it.”  She has no answer to that.  She will play Elvis, Gordon, and Lionel music for me.  

A little while ago I had her sing “Happy Birthday” to me, which she completed with “and many more.” 

Having her make my grocery list somehow seems wrong, as I still think paper and pencil works for me.  I’m not tiptoeing around her quite as much anymore.  When my youngest grandson was recently here he had her play some music to show me what he’s been learning on his brand new guitar.   

 Just a few minutes ago for a crossword puzzle I asked her what “abstruse” means and sure enough she quickly supplied “esoteric,” which fit perfectly.  No, I know what you are thinking; I haven’t asked her about that word that I shocked my adult grandchildren with………….yet.