The Light Lens: Time to split

by T. Touris –

Last year our neighbors generously offered some white oak logs from a tree they had taken down on their property. Being a hoarder of wood, I quickly accepted. These logs inconveniently resided up on a steep hill behind their house. I considered rolling them down the hill, but I

carefully calculated that the time for the log to roll through their living room, plus the time for me to make a getaway down the hill, was longer than the time it would take for them to retrieve their favorite weaponry. On to plan B: lure some gullible suckers into doing the grunt work.

Thus was born The Lumberjack for a Day Experience! Wherein, lucky participants would get to live the invigorating and exhilarating life of our pioneer forbearers. Splitting logs by hand, participants would get to use axes, hatchets, wedges and sledges. Swinging with abandon, all the frustrations and anxieties of modern life would be transferred to the mighty oak. In one afternoon, one would be educated, enlightened and revitalized – a singular experience to refresh the mind and body.

The success of the event exceeded my expectations. Friends and family were eagerly awaiting the chance to get their whacks in with the big sledge. After sweating a while over one especially big and gnarly log, we quickly had a nice bunch of manageable quarters that were easily moved to my growing log pile.

I still need to find the time to further break down the splits and maybe carve a few gift spoons or toothpicks for the participants. On the other hand, I could start planning the next event.  Next time I should probably charge a fee. After all, they should feel like they got their money’s worth.